We have a deeply moving conversation on the topic of red flags in relationships.
This episode is sponsored by Esther & Jerry Williams in honor of all those who support Shalom Task Force.
If you are in crisis please reach out to the Shalom Task Force Hotline at 888-883-2323.
On this episode of 18Forty, we have a deeply moving conversation on the topic of red flags in relationships. We speak with Esther Williams and Dr. Shoshannah Frydman from Shalom Task Force, and one person who extricated herself from an abusive relationship. The dynamics of relationships, whether healthy, unhealthy, or anywhere in between are complex, and we set out to better our understanding of the signs of relational abuse. Whether or not you have personally struggled with the issues we discuss here, we are all better off when we are more informed about the what and why of relational health, so tune in now.
In this interview, we discuss:
First interview begins at 10:35
The Shalom Task Force, Inc (STF) is a non-profit community organization that aims to combat and prevent domestic violence and foster safe and healthy relationships and families. The STF focuses on helping those in the Jewish community that may not have access to traditional services and that need culturally sensitive programming. The STF runs a free, anonymous hotline that helps individuals find the services they need, provides assistance through legal services, supportive counseling, and referral information, and offers prevention and psychoeducational workshops, trainings, and community programs to increase awareness of relationship abuse and promote healthy relationships.
Dr. Shoshannah Frydman, PhD, LCSW is the executive director of Shalom Task Force. Dr. Frydman is a trauma-informed therapist and advocate who has worked in the field of domestic abuse and family violence in the Jewish community for close to 20 years. Dr. Frydman co-chairs the UJA Taskforce on Family Violence, and was recently appointed to the New York City Mayor’s Office to End Domestic and Gender-Based Violence COVID-19 Response Group. Dr. Frydman previously served as the managing director of Family Violence and Social Services at the Met Council. Dr. Frydman received her MSW from the University of Maryland School of Social Work and her PhD at the Graduate Center of the City University of New York/Hunter College Silberman School of Social Work.
Esther Williams is the President of the Shalom Task Force and a past board member and executive vice president of the Orthodox Union.
References:
“Dealbreakers Talk Show #0001” on 30 Rock
National Domestic Abuse Hotline
“The Quick Shift: Orthodox Jewish Women’s Early Marital Sexual Experience” by Shoshannah D. Frydman
“Tradition and Transition. Orthodox Women’s Experience with Kallah Classes and Early Marital Intimacy” by Shoshannah D. Frydman
The Greatest Average American by Nate Bargatze
Shalom Task Force Guides and Educational Materials
I’m so Confused, Am I Being Abused? Guidance for the Orthodox Jewish Spouse and Those Who Want to Help by Lisa G. Twersky
Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson
Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft
Invisible Chains: Overcoming Coercive Control in Your Intimate Relationship by Lisa A. Fontes
No Visible Bruises: What We Don’t Know About Domestic Violence Can Kill Us by Rachel Louise Snyder
In this edition of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to David’s rebbe, Rav Yisroel Kaminetsky, longtime principal of DRS Yeshiva High School, about the state of Jewish education in America.
We talk to Rabbi Shlomo Pill about how Torah and teshuva have helped him handle his struggle with addiction.
We talk to Tania Friedlander about how her husband’s Parkinson’s diagnosis challenged her expectations and taught her to become capable of more.
We talk to Ben and Yael de Toledo about doing teshuva by returning to community.
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to Liel Leibovitz and Lisa Ann Sandell about what happens when one partner wants to increase their religious practice.
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to Eli Rubin—a scholar, Lubavitcher Hasid, and author of the forthcoming book Kabbalah and the Rupture of Modernity: An Existential History of Chabad Hasidism—about life’s big cosmic questions.
We talk to Mendel Horowitz, who introduces us to the notion of having a “good-enough Elul.”
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we sit down for a special podcast with our host, David Bashevkin, to discuss the podcast’s namesake, the year 1840.
In this special Purim episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we bring you a recording from our live event with the comedian Modi, for our annual discussion on humor.
David Bashevkin discusses how to embrace holiness, the purpose of prayer, and the search for meaning in an age of distraction.
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to Yosef Bronstein—a rabbi, writer, and scholar—about the philosophy of Chabad and the Lubavitcher Rebbe.
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to Rabbi Menachem Penner—dean of RIETS at Yeshiva University—and his son Gedalia—a musician, cantor-in-training, and member of the LGBTQ community—about their experience in reconciling their family’s religious tradition with Gedalia’s sexual orientation.
In this episode, we talk to a father and daughter who were estranged and then reunited.
The true enemy in Israel’s current war, Einat Wilf says, is what she calls “Palestinianism.”
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, David Bashevkin opens up about his mental health journey.
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we sit down with Rav Moshe Weinberger, rabbi and educator, to discuss the role of mysticism in modern-day Judaism.
As a Haredi woman of the Israeli left, Nechumi Yaffe lives between a few different worlds—and she feels at home in Israel’s new “Religious Left” movement.
Fally Klein joins us to discuss finding God in the everyday and where the Messiah might come from.
Haviv answers 18 questions on Israel.
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to Lizzy Savetsky, who went from a career in singing and fashion to being a Jewish activist and influencer, about her work advocating for Israel online.
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we sit down with Joey Rosenfeld, social worker and kabbalist, to talk about the differences between mysticism and rationalism and the roles they should play in our lives.
Elliot Wolfson joins us to discuss the mechanics of prayer, the constant recreation of time, and Pardes.
Shlomo Pill explains how mysticism is the soul of the Torah and prayer is the avenue through which we recognize God’s role in reality.
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to Talia Khan—a Jewish MIT graduate student and Israel activist—and her father, an Afghan Muslim immigrant, about their close father-daughter relationship despite their ideological disagreements.
A bedrock principle of Orthodox Judaism is that we received not only the Written Torah at Sinai but also the oral one—does…
Perhaps the most fundamental question any religious believer can ask is: “Does God exist?” It’s time we find good answers.
What can Rashi’s reading of Shir HaShirim teach us about antisemitism, Jewish identity, and the sources of resilience in a post-Oct. 7…
Kosher phones make calls and send texts. No Instagram, no TikTok, and no distractions. Maybe it’s time the world embraces them.
Christianity’s focus on the afterlife historically discouraged Jews from discussing it—but Jews very much believe in it.
To talk about the history of Jewish mysticism is in many ways to talk about the history of the mystical community.
Joy and meaning can be found not only despite the brokenness, but even because of the brokenness.
Children don’t come with guarantees. Washing machines come with guarantees.
Children cannot truly avoid the consequences of estrangement. Their parents’ shadow will always follow.
Parshat Ki Tavo warns us what happens when everything we’ve prayed for stops feeling like a gift.
What can Jewish law teach us about wealth, peer pressure, and communal responsibility? Two sources point in opposite directions.
Psychodynamic therapy is not for everyone. But for those who dare, it can change everything.
Before you open a page of Gemara, meet the people, ideas, and arguments that make the Talmud worth opening.
A 94-year-old Holocaust survivor, a lone soldier, and more. Here are seven olim sharing their stories of aliyah.
Is teshuva about changing ourselves, or is it about accepting who we are? For this paradox, Rav Shagar says, it’s both.
Israeli minister Itamar Ben-Gvir wears the mantle of Kahane in Israel. Many Orthodox Jews welcomed him with open arms.
Talking about the “Haredi community” is a misnomer, Jonathan Rosenblum says, and simplifies its diversity of thought and perspectives. A Yale-trained lawyer…
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to Ben and Yael de Toledo, founders of Pnima Jerusalem, a soulful community…
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we speak with Shais Taub, the rabbi behind the organization SoulWords, about shame, selfhood, and…
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we speak with Diana Fersko, senior rabbi of the Village Temple Reform synagogue, about denominations…
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, recorded live at Stern College, we speak with Rabbi Moshe Benovitz, director of NCSY Kollel,…
On this 18Forty panel, we speak with Alex Jakubowski of Lightning Studios, Sara Wolkenfeld of Sefaria, and Ari Lamm of BZ Media…
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, David Bashevkin answers questions from Diana Fersko, senior rabbi of the Village Temple Reform synagogue,…
We talk to Tania Friedlander about how her husband’s Parkinson’s diagnosis challenged her expectations and taught her to become capable of more.
In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we speak with Mark Wildes, founder and director of Manhattan Jewish Experience, about Modern Orthodox…
What draws a man trained in business and finance into the world of Kabbala? And what does it actually mean to find…
We talk to author and theoretical physicist Berel Leib Epstein about rational reasons to choose to believe in Judaism and live a…
As we live through the ups and downs of life, laughter begins to play an invaluable role in our mental well-being. In…
There is circularity that underlies nearly all of rabbinic law. Open up the first page of Talmud and it already assumes that…
A free 40-week journey through the Talmud. No Hebrew or background required. 7,000+ people have already signed up — join us.
