Day 28: The Capacity To Be Alone

Mendel Horowitz
Share
×

Share

In Theory: Within the psychodynamic tradition, D. W. Winnicott made a paradoxical observation that the capacity to be alone is acquired in the presence of another person. The infant who can play contentedly by themselves, does so because they have internalized the presence of a reliable caregiver. The adult who can be alone without restlessness and without the need to fill silence immediately has a sufficient internal world to sustain them. For those who did not receive adequate early holding, aloneness can feel less like solitude and more like abandonment, showing that internal continuity of presence makes absence bearable. This internalized presence acts as a quiet, unseen anchor, transforming what would otherwise be a terrifying psychological void into a space for reverie and self-discovery.

In Experience: Someone who fills every moment with input or activity, not from enthusiasm but from something closer to dread. The silence is too loud. Brief pauses feel unstable, as if something might surface if not immediately covered over. The movement toward stimulation is not chosen so much as compelled, a way of keeping what is inside at a distance.

In Thought: The experience of solitude is not the same for everyone. Whether quiet feels like rest or threat depends on what was internalized long before.

In Print: Storr, A. Solitude: A Return to the Self (1988)

In Attention: Notice what arises when sitting alone with no input.

Recommended Essays

Essays

A (Talmud) Page is Worth a Thousand Worlds

Beyond the words of the page, the Talmud teaches just as much Jewish history as it does Jewish law, revealing new insights…

Essays

‘It’s Not Great’: What’s the Deal With Jewish Education?

Jewish students, parents, and educators weigh in about what helps, what hurts, and what we need to do.

Essays

‘The Crisis of Experience’: What Singlehood Means in a Married Community

I spent months interviewing single, Jewish adults. The way we think about—and treat—singlehood in the Jewish community needs to change. Here’s how.

Essays

3 Questions To Ask Yourself Whenever You Hear a Dvar Torah

Not every Jewish educational institution that I was in supported such questions, and in fact, many did not invite questions such as…

Essays

American Judaism is Falling Apart. We Have Ourselves to Blame

Until recently, I too found myself almost entirely estranged from Jewish tradition. My return is showing me what we need to do…

Essays

Benny Morris Has Thoughts on Israel, the War, and Our Future

We interviewed this leading Israeli historian on the critical questions on Israel today—and he had what to say.

Recommended Videos

videos

Jonathan Rosenblum Answers 18 Questions on the Haredi Draft, Netanyahu, and a Religious State

Talking about the “Haredi community” is a misnomer, Jonathan Rosenblum says, and simplifies its diversity of thought and perspectives. A Yale-trained lawyer…

videos

A Vulnerable Conversation About Shame, Selfhood, & Authenticity with Shais Taub & David Bashevkin

In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we speak with Shais Taub, the rabbi behind the organization SoulWords, about shame, selfhood, and…

videos

Tania Friedlander: Teshuva and Becoming Capable of More

We talk to Tania Friedlander about how her husband’s Parkinson’s diagnosis challenged her expectations and taught her to become capable of more.

videos

Shlomo Pill: When a Rabbi Doctor Struggles With Addiction In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to rabbi, attorney, and…

videos

Ben and Yael de Toledo: Baalei Teshuva Building Community in Israel

In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to Ben and Yael de Toledo, founders of Pnima Jerusalem, a soulful community…

videos

Moshe Benovitz: Why Religious Change Doesn’t Always Last

In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, recorded live at Stern College, we speak with Rabbi Moshe Benovitz, director of NCSY Kollel,…

videos

Julia Senkfor & Cameron Berg: Does AI Have an Antisemitism Problem?

In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast—recorded at the 18Forty X ASFoundation AI Summit—we speak with ASF’s Julia Senkfor and AI researcher…

videos

Torah Study and ChatGPT: How Should Jewish Education Respond to AI?

On this 18Forty panel, we speak with Alex Jakubowski of Lightning Studios, Sara Wolkenfeld of Sefaria, and Ari Lamm of BZ Media…

videos

An Orthodox Rabbi Interviews a Reform Rabbi | Dovid Bashevkin & Diana Fersko

In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we speak with Diana Fersko, senior rabbi of the Village Temple Reform synagogue, about denominations…

videos

Jewish Peoplehood

What is Jewish peoplehood? In a world that is increasingly international in its scope, our appreciation for the national or the tribal…

videos

Etan Epstein: New Journeys in Torah Learning

In this episode of the 18Forty Podcast, we talk to Rabbi Etan Epstein, the founder of The 300 Club, a program of…

videos

Mysticism

In a disenchanted world, we can turn to mysticism to find enchantment, to remember that there is something more under the surface…